Well, not much going on. I haven't got my skeletal survey back yet. As I said, I don't have any bone pain, so everything ought to be ok. I'm definitely curious, but I imagine when I go to Dr Phan next week I'll get those results.
Today I get a procrit shot. It's to help my blood count, which is kept low by the chemo and host of drugs I take. I'm feeling pretty energetic, so I don't think I'm that low, but we'll get the shot anyhow. Last time I did blood work was a week and a half ago and I was low.
I'm pretty much working full time. Only time I miss work is when I have chemo or an appointment. I do my maintenance chemo once every other week. I see Berenson once a month. I take a host of meds at home. I work out. It's all pretty much routine at this point. Which is a good thing for sure.
But this also brings me to the point of this post. Routine. For quite a while there I was just happy to go to work, to walk the dog, to hang out with Leslie and friends. All of that seemed great and such a welcome relief. But as time goes by, I find myself falling into old habits. Bored with work, getting a bit unmotivated. I find myself plotting, scheming, day dreaming about doing something else, about finally doing what I should be doing. But shockingly after all this, I still don't know what it is. Don't get me wrong, I'm super happy with how I am doing and super happy with my life. Things are great. But the mind is funny. Or maybe my mind is funny. I think too much about routines, I think too much about needing a passion. I find it weird, I have this life altering experience, I'm a better person, happier person, more appreciative of everything and everyone around me. But at times it is not enough. There needs to be more. There are times I wish I could shut the old noggin down and just be. But like I've said before, compared to where I was last year at this time......this is way better. Generally I'm at peace with myeloma.