Tuesday, August 23, 2011

I hate roller coasters

We go to Berenson and he says there are encouraging signs. Awesome! Then we see Phan and he paints a less rosy picture. Not so awesome. Kidney functions are worse than ever, but they are still working. Ummm...ok. A month ago, kidney doctor was all panicky over state of kidneys. Now she is all casual about it. Head scratcher. Going to see another kidney doctor tomorrow for another opinion. Need to get those tricky little bastards under control.

Still been getting low grade fevers but today was chemo and it's likely the steroids in the chemo are preventing a fever today. Plus my voice is gone, which seems to happen after chemo.

So tomorrow I'll work half day then go to new kidney dr.

So as you can see, this myeloma ride is a real roller coaster. And I don't like it. Then you throw in all of life's stresses which get magnified by illness, and my head is ready to explode. I think for both me and Leslie, we feel like we're 4 months in and no further along. What the hell?

My 50th is less than 2 months away and I can honestly say that I didn't envision dealing with cancer as how I would be celebrating. I was super excited to turn 50. Not so much now.

3 comments:

  1. Think about yellow river by I pee freely. Plan on making lots of yellow snow this winter!! Use subliminal messages to kick those kidneys back into shape!! Luv sis

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  2. Hello, Mr. Positive here....

    I go with Berenson diagnosis, not Phan's. Never been a huge Phan.

    Voice is gone.... good break for Leslie there. Gretta and I have found it's best not to talk.... we just text while following each other around the house. The other night I was rubbing her feet and sent her the text: "Ok, i'm done. Move your leg now" Very effective. Just kidding. It's not that effective.

    (Ok..... this paragraph you have to read in the voice of Chris Rock on stage during a concert. I'm taking timeout from the positive to do an impression): "Speaking of not effective.... how about these Fucking Kidneys...... The Fucking Kidneys. Sounds like a punk band or some shit....... I googled kidneys and you know what popped up? Kidney Stones, Kidney Infection, Kidney Failure, Kidney Disease, Kidney Pain, Kidney Failure. Aint that some fucked up shit??? Not one goddamn positive on the whole google? How about throwing in "Candy" or "Boobies" just for the fuck of it?"

    Ok, here's a fun game...... 6 people as stressed as you:

    6) Tiger Woods. Life was so much easier when his lackies were setting up different women for him every night in between popping pills, juicing, winning tournaments and becoming sports' 1st billionaire. Now he's just a cheater with no friends who sucks at golf.

    5) Head writer in charge of new storylines on "Jersey Shore"

    4) Member of an NBA Dance Squad with the strike looking like a sure thing -- if you do a freaky pole dance in the middle of a basketball court during halftime of a game that didn't really happen..... did you really do the freaky dance?

    3) Justin Bieber -- after recent breakup, how and where is he going to find another girl?

    2) Me in my NFL auction draft.... really, Romo at $24 a better value pick than Rothlisburger at $13? Really important stuff.

    and..... 1) Obama -- his approval rating is going down faster than Bill Clinton's...... ahhhhhhhhhh, forget it.


    Say hello to Paul Shafer and the Late Night band......

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  3. For the record: Jay's comment above is phenomenal. Also: We love you!!

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